All joking side, I have started to become a teeny bit anxious about my upcoming MTX injection.
I spent an hour or so late last night/early this morning, as I was restless and sleepless, reading up on many people's experiences of self administering their doses of MTX , and they took the time to share their story, answer questions, etc. I have picked up my prescriptions of needles and meds, and have to say, I am very intimidated by the needles. I am not a needle phobic person, but for some reason, looking at them - freaks me out some! I believe they appear to be these large needles, but after all my reading, everyone has said how they are small, and really not that bad. It's a mental thing, I am sure. I just keep reminding myself that I will feel better!
I spoke to the new NP this morning and got the results of my MRI I had last week, it "proved existence of Rheumatoid Disease, or Inflammatory Arthritis" ... as if I had any doubt! When I hung up the phone, I felt a sense of relief at the news. For some reason I keep looking for justification of all this pain I am in. It leads me back to the first dr I saw, who was making me feel like I was crazy for all the symptoms. The dr who told me "your ankle pain is not related to RA, it's from old basketball injuries" - and brings me right back to the day when I left his office, feeling hopeless and defeated, which was later followed up by determination and stubbornness! I refused to accept that that was it for me, a life of pain, and "resting" to make myself feel better. I don't have time to rest! I am so glad I sought out another dr, and refused to settle into the life the first told me I "had' to live.
I have become a fan of another blog, which is written by a women who also has RA. She is beyond educated in the disease, and I could never compare to her in regards to her knowledge, etc. What I can compare to is, when she writes about how she feels, when she gets personal, I feel like I am reading my own words. I could be the person "saying" everything she is saying. I thought I would share a recent article that she wrote, where I feel like after my experiences lately, I could have written it word for word.
http://rawarrior.com/what-would-the-car-mechanic-say-if-you-didnt-look-sick/?utm_source=feedburner&utm_medium=email&utm_campaign=Feed%3A+RheumatoidArthritisWarrior+%28Rheumatoid+Arthritis+Warrior%29
So, as I mentioned - tomorrow is the big day. My first MTX injection. The first day of the rest of my life, Wish me luck!
Be well,
MB
I spent an hour or so late last night/early this morning, as I was restless and sleepless, reading up on many people's experiences of self administering their doses of MTX , and they took the time to share their story, answer questions, etc. I have picked up my prescriptions of needles and meds, and have to say, I am very intimidated by the needles. I am not a needle phobic person, but for some reason, looking at them - freaks me out some! I believe they appear to be these large needles, but after all my reading, everyone has said how they are small, and really not that bad. It's a mental thing, I am sure. I just keep reminding myself that I will feel better!
I spoke to the new NP this morning and got the results of my MRI I had last week, it "proved existence of Rheumatoid Disease, or Inflammatory Arthritis" ... as if I had any doubt! When I hung up the phone, I felt a sense of relief at the news. For some reason I keep looking for justification of all this pain I am in. It leads me back to the first dr I saw, who was making me feel like I was crazy for all the symptoms. The dr who told me "your ankle pain is not related to RA, it's from old basketball injuries" - and brings me right back to the day when I left his office, feeling hopeless and defeated, which was later followed up by determination and stubbornness! I refused to accept that that was it for me, a life of pain, and "resting" to make myself feel better. I don't have time to rest! I am so glad I sought out another dr, and refused to settle into the life the first told me I "had' to live.
I have become a fan of another blog, which is written by a women who also has RA. She is beyond educated in the disease, and I could never compare to her in regards to her knowledge, etc. What I can compare to is, when she writes about how she feels, when she gets personal, I feel like I am reading my own words. I could be the person "saying" everything she is saying. I thought I would share a recent article that she wrote, where I feel like after my experiences lately, I could have written it word for word.
http://rawarrior.com/what-would-the-car-mechanic-say-if-you-didnt-look-sick/?utm_source=feedburner&utm_medium=email&utm_campaign=Feed%3A+RheumatoidArthritisWarrior+%28Rheumatoid+Arthritis+Warrior%29
So, as I mentioned - tomorrow is the big day. My first MTX injection. The first day of the rest of my life, Wish me luck!
Be well,
MB
My advice is to not let what you read on the Internet scare you. A lot of times, people only post up about their bad experiences, and you never get to hear all of the good. The Internet is a scary place for (a lot of times, inaccurate) medical information. (((hugs)))
ReplyDeleteI constantly find myself avoiding the internet, solely because 95% of what you read is either untrue, or negative. I began by researching where people do the injections, and that led me to looking at peoples experiences. I will say that most of what I find, at least regarding RA - has been very positive, and the amount of support people offer each other is incredible!
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